The reason why My Life with Edward Cullen has been in hiatus for almost two months is because I can’t find him! He is missing! I’ve been trying to look for him but alas, he’s nowhere to be found!

Almost two months have passed, Edward….please come back…

Did you go to the Volturi? Did you return to Bella? You didn’t even say goodbye…

It’s not like I have a Jacob.

Oh well, at least I can look forward to the showing of New Moon.

As we were partaking of the scrumptious breakfast (The buñuelos were awesome! See the picture.), Edward waited beside us. I took a photo of him as he waited and I think you’ll agree that after seeing this photo you all want to visit Josephine’s breakfast buffet. Isn’t Edward the best model?

Edward Cullen at Josephine's Tagaytay

Actually, the Josephine’s breakfast buffet was just ok. It was more the company that made the trip memorable. I went with three of my closest girlfriends. It’s like Sex and the City, isn’t it? I’m glad I have them along to obsess over Twilight and Korean telenovelas (My latest obsession).

After breakfast, we went outside to take in the view of Taal Lake and Taal Volcano. I took a photo of Edward overlooking Taal Volcano.

Edward Cullen points out Taal Volcano.

He playfully pointed it out and said, “This is an amazing sight! It’s so beautiful that it overshadowed my sparkle.”

I laughed. I did notice that he didn’t sparkle that much this time around. Maybe that’s the effect of the dinuguan…

After taking in the sights of Taal Lake and Taal Volcano, I sat at an intricate bench at Josephine’s and Edward made me laugh by making this funny pose.

Edward Cullen being silly.

“Thank you for bringing me here. I had a great time.” he said as his eyes smoldered.

“No, thank you for accompanying me,” I replied.

What a great first out-of-town trip with Edward!

So what should a 30-something mom-of-two do to commemorate Edward Cullen’s birthday? Well, something that can please him and her family, of course!

Behold, my own original recipe for Edward Cullen’s Bloody Chocolate Cupcakes! This recipe is healthier since I incorporated yogurt to bring moisture to the cupcakes. As you can see, Edward had a great time making it with me. Check out the recipe below.

Edward Cullen and the Blood-Red Cupcake Liners

Edward Cullen and the cupcakes before they enter the oven.

Edward Cullen's Bloody Chocolate Cupcake

EDWARD CULLEN’S BLOODY CHOCOLATE CUPCAKES

Ingredients:

FOR THE CUPCAKES

3 to 4 ounces Hershey’s semi-sweet chocolate chips

1 cup all-purpose flour

½ teaspoon baking powder

½ teaspoon baking soda

¼ teaspoon salt

½ cup unsalted butter, softened

1 ¼ cups sugar

2 large eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

½ cup of creamy or plain yogurt

½ cup of water

FOR THE FROSTING

Really good strawberry preserve or jam

Powdered sugar

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees with the rack placed on the center.
2. Melt the chocolate by placing it in a stainless steel or heatproof bowl and setting it atop barely simmering water. Once melted, remove chocolate from heat and set aside.
3. Prepare the dry ingredients by sifting together the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Set aside.
4. In a bigger bowl, cream butter and sugar using an electric mixer set at medium speed. When light and fluffy, add the melted chocolate and mix in low speed. When chocolate is mixed in, add eggs one at a time and increase the speed to medium. Add vanilla and beat until mixture is creamy (about one minute). Mix in yogurt. Using low speed, add in half of the flour mixture. After batter is well incorporated, add in remaining flour mixture and mix until incorporated. Do not over-mix batter to avoid tough cupcakes.
5. Line a cupcake pan with red paper liners. Fill each liner with enough batter to come 1/8 inch from the top. Bake for 20 minutes. Rotate the pan halfway through in order to ensure even cooking. To check if cupcakes are ready, use a cake tester by inserting it in the center. If it comes out clean, it is ready.
6. Take out the cupcakes from the oven and let cool.
7. Frost the cupcakes with strawberry preserve. Dust the cupcake with powdered sugar using an “E” stencil.
8. Enjoy and sing Edward Cullen a birthday song.

I hope you all enjoy this simple cupcake recipe and Edward…you thought I only made cupcakes (which realistically you can’t eat). Well, I also made you this greeting. Happy 108th!

Happy Birthday, Edward Cullen!

Edward Cullen notices the error.

“Look at this error. I am not a ming reader.” Edward said as he pointed out the error.

“Wow, you noticed that?” I replied.

“Of course. I am not just a fast runner. I am also a speed reader.” Edward replied. “Why do you suppose they printed ming instead of mind?”

“Since the Edward Cullen action figure was made in China, I think it was just an honest typographical error.” I answered.

“You are of Chinese descent. Do you know what ming means?” Edward asked.

I did not know so I offered to check its meaning by conducting a search using the very reliable Wikipedia. I read the information out loud to Edward.

“According to this, ming in Chinese is directly translated as enlightenment. The actual Chinese character for ming is a conjunction of the words sun and moon. These represent light and therefore, enlightenment.”

Edward thought to himself for a short while.

“I did not know that the meaning of ming is so beautiful. I guess the error was not too bad given the meaning of the word ming.” Edward said.

“The Chinese language is indeed a beautiful language. If you want to appreciate it more, may I suggest something to you?” I asked.

“Of course.” Edward replied.

“Since I am working during the week and you have nothing much to do at home, you can watch this really good Taiwanese television series entitled Fated to Love You. You can use my DVD player. My copy has English translation.” I suggested.

Fated to Love You Poster

“Oh…ok.” Edward answered.

“Tell me what you think afterwards, ok?” I said.

“Sure.” Edward replied.

What a real gentleman Edward is. Other guys would probably not take my suggestion seriously.

As I was going through the various birthday greetings including the ones in Twilight Lexicon, Pattinson Online and Letters to Rob, I felt left out. I decided to make one of my own even if there’s a very slim chance that Robert Pattinson will ever see it.

My Robert Pattinson Birthday Greeting

Funny thing. After I completed my greeting, I heard Edward stomp around the room obviously annoyed. When I turned, I saw him looking at his reflection in a nearby mirror.

Edward talks to himself.

“Will he look this good when he’s 107 years old?” Edward hissed to himself.

I had to stifle a laugh. Who would’ve thought vampires would be so jealous of 23-year-old heartthrobs?

Edward sparkles under the sun.

I was torn. I can’t keep him in the house hungry. I have children. He may not be able to restrain himself. What would a mother do?

Of course…I have to think of an alternative. Edward drinks animal blood…where can I get or order some animal blood? Jollibee? No. McDonald’s? No. Chowking? No. Pizza Hut? No. Red Ribbon…

Aha! Just a few calls and I can have his meal delivered.

I hope that this risk works…it should work.

When his food arrived, I took it out of the package and transferred it lovingly on a nice bowl.

“Edward! Your food is ready.” I called.

“You hunted for me? How did you get a mountain lion in the metropolis?” Edward answered with eyes so black, it scared me. He IS hungry.

“No. I ordered something for you.” I replied.

“You ordered something for me? Have you forgotten that I am a vampire? There is nothing in restaurants you can order for me.” Edward responded.

“In the Philippines, there is…” I replied. Then, I presented him with his food.

Edward Cullen sees his meal--the dinuguan.

“Here, try this. It’s called dinuguan or pork blood stew. I can have the coke if you don’t want it.”

“Oh…” Edward said as he curiously examined my offering. “This is new. Why is it black?”

“Well, the blood has been cooked. Why don’t you try it? It is still hot…I know you like your food warm.” I encouraged.

“I smell garlic and chilis…” Edward replied.

“Is that a problem? I can take them out for you.” I offered.

“No. You know that the vampires and garlic theory is not true.” Edward responded.

“Go ahead, Edward. Eat…I mean, drink.” I said.

Edward bent over and devoured the dinuguan in lightning speed. After his meal, he looked up. His eyes were golden again.

Edward smiled his crooked smile and said “I like it here in Manila. Even the people eat and drink blood.”

I’m glad my risk worked. Thank goodness for dinuguan!

“You do not know Manny Pacquiao? How long have you been living under a huge boulder?” my hubby replied.

“To be fair, I have been extremely preoccupied with fighting the Volturi, raising a vampire baby and learning how to desensitize myself from werewolves’ smells,” Edward replied. “I didn’t have time to watch ESPN.”

“Oh, Edward,” I said, “it’s such a travesty! You have to get to know Manny Pacquiao. He is the best boxer who ever lived. Here,” I added, “let me show you what Manny Pacquiao can do.”

I quickly turned my computer on and showed him this TeamPilipinas video of the legendary Pacquiao-Hatton fight.

“Wow, that is phenomenal! He is lightning fast and obviously very strong.” Edward said.

“Obviously,” I replied. “How do you think you would fare in a fight with Pacquiao? You’re a vampire with mindreading powers after all.”

“ I am a vampire and I am stronger than the average human but after seeing that fight…” his voice trailed off. “…even I am scared of him. He has my highest regard.”

“You can also do incredible things, Edward. Remember these?” I said as I showed him these two photos.

Edward saves Bella from a car crash.

Edward saves Bella from James

“You saved Bella from certain death twice.”

“Yeah, I did. I guess that makes me a bit of a hero too, huh?” Edward replied.

“I’d say. This gives me an idea…can you do something for me?” I asked.

“Tell me what you want, and you can have it.” Edward replied.

“I want a photo of my two heroes of the day.” I said and Edward obliged.

Edward Cullen and Manny Pacquiao

I also told him that the way we observe Labor Day is different from the US. We don’t have picnics and parties in Manila. In fact, during Labor Day, labor unions and movements march the streets to present their causes and to celebrate (if any) their successes. Edward politely corrected me and said that they also have similar festivities during Labor Day. Edward pensively walked towards the Twilight calendar now set to the month of May. After a few moments, he told me that he has a message for the admirable men and women who fight for workers’ rights.

Edward welcomes the month of May.

“Be safe.” Edward said.

Have a great Labor Day, everyone.

I was on one of my daily Twilight/New-Moon/Robert-Pattinson-related research rituals when Edward asked if he could also go online; apparently, he wanted to check his email. Knowing that he can read my mind, I sent him a signal that maybe he could buy me a present using his Platinum credit card. He gave me one of his crooked smiles. After recovering from the hyperventilation caused by his awesome smile, I graciously lent him my iTouch since given his size, the iTouch is perfect for him.

Not long after, I heard Edward growl…you got that right…he growled. I looked over to see what the commotion was about and I saw this.

Edward sees the werewolves.

“I can’t believe these dogs have their picture out on the web!” Edward said in an annoyed tone. “They do not even look this good in real life. This was obviously photoshopped.” He growled again.

“I think they look awfully sexy in that picture,” I replied, “especially the one on the far left.”

Edward was obviously irritated by my answer so I backpedalled.

“You also have a sexy picture out on the web. Here, I’ll show you.” I sat beside him and searched for the New Moon picture passed from Twilighter to Twilighter.

Edward sees the impostor.

Then, it happened.

“This isn’t me! This is just an actor trying to be me. This is incredibly insulting. I think somebody photoshopped this imposter’s head over Jason Lee’s The Crow poster. I look 107% better than this guy.” Edward bellowed.

I never thought that he would be so annoyed by these pictures. I didn’t know how to help him calm down. Then, I thought of an idea.

“Edward, would you like to see something incredibly funny?” I asked.

“Sure.” He replied.

Then, I brought him to this website called Letters to Rob. We spent the whole afternoon reading the funny letters to the imposter actor playing him. After Edward calmed down, I reassured him that he is way hotter than the werewolves and the imposter Edward. Edward shrugged and gave me one of his crooked smiles.

“I’m the world’s best predator, aren’t I?” Everything about me invites you in—my voice, my face, even my smell. As if I need any of that!” Edward said seductively.

I just had to put him in his place and burst his bubble a little.

“Actually, Edward. You smell like rubber.” I replied.

Edward sees the Twilight books.

“I see that you read about my past…” Edward politely said. “Please know that I am ready to create a future with you,” he continued.

I was speechless. It’s a good thing my hubby was in this with me or I’d feel like I were being unfaithful. Suddenly, Edward looked up and saw obsession evidence #2–my Twilight clock.

Edward sees the Twilight clock.

“Wow, this is a phenomenal clock,” Edward said. “You should know, though, that from this day on, I will love you forever…every day of forever…”

Oh my gosh, I just died and went to twiven.

Then reality crept in… I realized that I’d better hide all my other OCD stuff like my Team Edward hoodie, my Twilight DVD, and my Twilight movie companion book. I have to make sure he doesn’t see my photo collection in my laptop. OMG. Edward can read my mind! He must think I’m obsessive! So much for keeping cool, calm and collected!

I tried to quickly hide all other OCD obsession evidence from Edward but he was too fast for me. Just a few milliseconds after seeing the clock, he saw obsession evidence #3—my customized Twilight Starbucks tumbler. I felt myself turn beet-red. I can’t believe Edward now knows that I sip my hot drinks while looking at his hotterness!

Edward jokingly climbs my Twilight tumbler.

“You better hold on tight, spidermonkey.” Edward joked as he climbed onto my tumbler.

Ok, Edward touched the tumbler. I am NOT washing that tumbler ever again! Wait a minute, Edward probably just heard that thought. I’d better learn how to guard my thoughts around him.

“Hey, Edward! Check this out!” My hubby called from the bedroom.

Edward flew his way, with me running right behind him. I stopped in the doorway and gasped. Oh no, obsession evidence #4—my treasured Twilight premiere ticket! There is no way I can save my dignity now! It is definite: Edward now knows of my incurable Obsessive Cullen Disorder (OCD)!

Edward poses with my Twilight premiere ticket.

“Look, I think the ticket looks better with the original Edward.” Edward mused.

All I could say in my tomato-faced glory was “Yeah, you do. You’re a real doll.”